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Think Before you Speak, Action To Our Over Reaction


Busy week, very late nights and very early starts. I guess that it comes with the territory, and as such is not something that you can say you never knew about once you have accepted a role within the hospitality world. It is funny, cycling to and from work at just the time of day when the streets are the quietest, the need in some instances to remind yourself to concentrate, and avoid becoming hypnotised by the sound of your own thoughts.

So there I am, coming to the end of a long evening meeting in advance of a following days conference. I am having to cover all of the same bases for the fifth time, and change a room set up for the sixth. It’s late, i’m tired and a little hungry, and although I know that I still have work to do, I figure a cup of tea and  some peace in the office will make the job get done that little bit quicker.

So down stairs I go, and to my astonishment, three of my team are still at their desks working. Let me put things a little more in to perspective. When I say late, I mean past ten. My team are usually in from nine at the latest, and whilst working a regular twelve hour day may be all to familiar to them, in some way, it shouldn’t have to be. Time management is of course something that needs to be reviewed on an ongoing basis, and there is always the fine balance that has to exist to ensure that some kind of work life balance can exist.

This was when the build up of pressure from the last few days decided to hit me, and I began an email that was directed at my boss, and the idea that it was just ridiculous that the team had so much work on that this was how they were spending their evening.

And then I stopped.

I read and re read the email, and could’t escape the fact that I wasn’t happy with how it sounded – whatever tenses and stresses I placed on the words, I just couldn’t make it sound how I had thought it would when keys were first pressed, and I had to push myself to take a step back and think slightly more wider picture about my motivation fo writing, and what it was I actually wanted to say.

In the end, I deleted the whole thing, and simply sent a message that was brief, and to the point – that I felt it would be worthwhile to touch base the following day and catch up about structure, expectation and plans for the future. I brought myself the time I needed to really think about what I wanted to say, and more importantly how I was going to say it. When I went in to speak with her today, I made the point I wanted to and the plan was initially set in to motion

It is very easy to jump, and how high you jump can sometimes just determine how hard you then fall. It is hard , and especially when you think you have something important that needs to be said, to take the step back that you need in order to really determine the possible outcome of your words. In a world where people so often prefer to write rather than just pick up the phone or speak face to face, so much is left wide open to interpretation and perception from the person at the other end of the correspondence, and with that comes too many ways of possible misunderstanding.

On occasion the words do come out before the brain kicks in to gear, and dealing with that can sometimes make us all look a little foolish. The advice I would give is simple, and something that no doubt mothers have recommended for an eternity, “think before you speak” and give yourself the breathing space to well, breathe.

I would love to hear your thoughts, how best do you ensure that you are able to keep the emotions in check when they need to be, and yet still make your point in the right way?


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